day 278: a letter in the alphabet

 

Joanna and Bianca hosted a slumber party for Fish, Carla and myself. I haven't been to a slumber party in a long time (like since I was a little girl)
Joanna and I started with a marathon viewing party for Project Runway at 4:30pm. Earlier in the day we exchanged email about bringing food and Bianca assured us that she had enough food. I don't think she knew what she was in for. Joanna and I proceeded to eat a whole tray of snacks, just the two of us. We had to turn up the volume on the TV, because our crunching was so loud.  What can we say Bianca makes delicious food, so how could we not devour it? We enjoyed pizza from Mozza, and stove-top popped popcorn. mmm, mmm, mmmm
The night was filled with games. As a result, I'm gonna buy Catch Phrase. This game is hilarious. The best descriptions were "it starts with a letter in the alphabet" and "it's a word in a book" Awesome. I have not laughed so hard. It was definitely what I needed.  Sooooo much fun!
It was a bummer that my allergies started to affect me. As soon as I took an antihistamine I was out, both at night and the next morning. I had to cut out early the next morning, because I couldn't breathe. Thank you to Joanna and Bianca for hosting such a wonderful party. Thank you to Carla, Fish and Jeannie for providing all of the laughs.

This photo was provided by Bianca, I didn't take out my camera once. :O I've been so bad lately.

day 272: marathon packing & BarBQ

I’m marathon packing. My cousin is in town and is willing to take some items back to NM for me. I’m so lucky.

I stopped by Joanna and Bianca’s for a BarBQ, this is the ice cream maker making delicious grapefruit sorbet. :(

day 258: airstream

Here are pics of Tim & Mark's new project: renovation of an Airstream.

day 257: Morongo Valley

Spent the weekend in Morongo Valley with Tim, Mark, Steven, Kristy, Bianca and Joanna. After my meltdown, I'm so thankful that my friends took me away.

 

day 256: 3.5 - the breaking point

This was the breaking point. I haven't posted anything since this day, because this day was so exhausting. I needed some time to come to terms with my decision. It was the beginning of October and for the few days before I was thinking of moving to NM. If I made the decision it was gonna be today. I had to give a 30 day notice to my manager. My roommate gave me his notice a few days earlier and said he would be moving to Colorado.
Factors in my decision were:
finances: I'm losing so much money by living in LA, and if I'm still unemployed at the end of my unemployment insurance, I'm not sure what I will do.
looking for another roommate: I figured my luck of finding another cool roommate was running out, between Duane and Lucas, I was very fortunate.
the rising unemployment rate: the national unemployment rate is 9.8%. I always forget that the beginning of the month starts with bad news.
holidays: most companies don't hire through the holidays (even when  the economy is good)
potential jobs: I had three potential jobs and didn't get any of them. This was a definite blow to my confidence.
my car: I've had some recent car problems... I swear, when it rains it pours. 
the moon: maybe a little bit of the full moon came into play. :P 
stress: each day I'm losing a little bit of myself: my confidence, my sanity, and my happiness.

I was so stressed I worked out 3.5 times (0.5 is the brisk walk): I ran 3 miles in the morning, rode my bike down to Redondo beach, came home had lunch and rode to Bel-air and then around midnight I took a brisk walk to Fairfax and back. The picture above is one I took in the morning: before the meltdown, before I made the decision. The photos below are in Manhattan Beach.

A huge "Thank you" goes out to Mark and Tim for making sure I was ok. I know it must have been scary for you, but thank you for talking to me so late at night. Thank you for being my friends.

 

day 236: traveltown

We celebrated Kristy & Steven's birthday party at Traveltown. I was about an 1.5 hours late, because I didn't think it was so early in the morning. Traveltown is amazing. They so many locomotive engines. It's so cool! This is grandma showing Steven how to feed Kristy's baby.

day 204: bathroom renovation

This is another preview of a bathroom renovation I photographed. I intentionally picked the most abstract photo, because I don't want to give away too much until the client has seen the proofs. :)

day 200: intent

I've been reading/researching various ideas, people and projects. I've realized that I have not focused on one area. I've notice that people who are successful give their all (heart and soul) to one project. From hear on out I'm doing that, and I realize with this photo-a-day blog that I'm not letting you in on the bad times: allowing myself to be vulnerable. I thought, "who wants to read about a depressing day where I'm stressed out?" Who wants to know that "Inconsistencies on your form" is such a vague statement on the f-ing unemployment notice?

Being unemployed sucks. It sucks ass. It's fun for about a week. After a month there's one major meltdown. You've strategized, punched the numbers, but life happens and you can't predict it. You question all of the choices you've made. There's doubt that creeps into your mind about your talent and abilities. It sucks. Some days are better than others, and sometimes it comes down to a few good hours. I will say that it brings out a good human trait, and that's taking care of each other, whether it's financial or emotional. So many people are willing to open their hearts to you. It's absolutely amazing.

I keep thinking that when I look back on this time, I want to say that I accomplished so many personal goals, but sometimes those goals are clouded by living day-to-day. It's hard to look long term. A year from now seems faraway and ten years? I can't even fathom it. As each day passes you hope that you're inching closer to the end of this chapter in your life, but then the news reminds you that this will be longer than anyone expected.

The good part, if you can call it that, is that there are others out there in the same boat. It's comforting and discomforting. At least you have people to confide in and go places with. Talking to friends who have jobs is awkward. They want to bitch about their jobs, but are quickly reminded to be thankful they have a job. Employers are pushing them to the limit and employees are doing it in fear of losing their job.

I am thankful there are unemployment benefits, one doesn't start the job force to think that they'll be unemployed. I am happy that this nation takes care of the unemployed, if not our health.

day 175: meltdown 2.0

Not having a job: SUX. I wish I could ctrl-z some things in my life.

day 167: visits

I enjoyed the afternoon with Joanna & Bianca. We discussed options for my future. I'm always amazed with the culinary delights that Bianca produces. :)

This is a shot of me on my bike, clipped in. It's such a beautiful day, that driving in a car didn't seem appropriate.

day 137: ALC 8

Bianca and I went to Ventura, well actually Solvang (not planned), to cheer on the cyclists of the AIDS Life Cycle ride. They were scheduled to ride from Solvang to Ventura (84 miles), but an accident on HWY 101 and inclement weather canceled the ride. We planned to station ourselves closer to Ventura, but when we got the call from Brendan, a member of the Sweep crew, informing us of the canceled ride, we drove up to Solvang to pick up some stranded riders. About 1700 cyclists were stranded in Solvang awaiting a bus ride down to Ventura. With a few 50-seat buses circulating the route, transporting cyclists, you could tell that the exhaustion was setting in. ALC had no contingency plan for a canceled ride, but I think the "roadies" handled the situation calmly and efficiently. Although my photos don't include anyone riding a bike, it was amazing day to see the dedicated roadies at work.

As I mentioned Brendan is part of the sweep crew along with his partner, Bud. They pick up riders who need assistance. Their theme was LOST: they rented a VW bus and had Darma Initiative outfits. Apparently they were a famous crew. Congratulations to everyone who participated in ALC 8. Closing ceremonies are on Saturday, June 6, 2009.

day 126: memorial day barbq

Joanna and Bianca hosted a gourmet BarBQ. It was the perfect way to end a perfect day. I conquered Nichol's Canyon on my bike and my two feet. I deserve this meal. :)

Thinking of all veterans and those who are on active duty. Thank you. :)

day 103: sand dune park/santa monica stairs challenge

I had the crazy idea to do this challenge today. I got the idea when I read a comment (somewhere, I think it was Youtube) where someone asked, "I wonder which is harder Sand Dune Park or Santa Monica Stairs."

Instead of waiting a week, when I didn't have a race to run, I decided that I would do it this week. Call it impatient or competitive, I couldn't wait. In addition to doing the challenge, I rode my bike to both of the locations. The ride was 42 miles round trip and, of course, was accompanied by two flat tires at about miles 28 and 33. It was due. The first flat tire was fine, it was the front tire. I had one CO2 cartridge, but the second was my back tire. By this time, I had finished two courses of the Santa Monica Stairs and was spent. The physical pumping of the tire was exhausting. Those last 9 miles on my bike were killer.
Ok, so which is harder? I can't quite tell right now. They are both physically challenging. Sand Dune Park: the picture doesn't do the hill justice. It's STEEP and every step I took I would slip down half a step. My calves were on fire. The park was also about 5 blocks in from the beach and a steep hill up from the coast. So my ass was already tired from the long ride and the steep climb. Santa Monica Stairs: 142 steps of pure (ass) hell. My butt/thighs were burning. After the second climb my thighs felt like they were in complete atrophy. hahaha Try it! It was tough, but I'll probably do this challenge again. What can I say, I'm a masochist. haha

day 097: cabernet savignon

Last night I caught up with Joanna. Bianca went to Minnesota for a conference. What was suppose to be an early evening turned into a late (midnight) night.

Being unemployed I have my ups and downs and I get so consumed in what is happening with myself that sometimes I need to be reminded of the bigger picture. Thank you to Joanna for reminding me of this.

day 077: series of intersecting lives and incidents

I'm reminded by my friend, Amy, that bad things happen in threes. one: lost job, two: identity fraud, three: hit & run. I do hope this is the end of it.

Today feels like that scene from Benjamin Button, when Daisy was hit by the car. Everything had to happen in order for me to be hit by that red car, accident or design, it had to happen. I don't know the particulars about the other people involved: the guy in the car, the guy in the Dooley truck, the 10-year-old girl on the Razor scooter, or the two EMTs. I know that for me, I had to have an extra cup of tea this morning. I usually only have one cup, but opted for two. Firefox crashed and I had to reopen all the windows again. I forgot to put on sunscreen and ran back upstairs to lather it on. I decided to read one more chapter in my book at the park. Waiting in line at the Post Office, the AC forced me to put on my sweat jacket which protected me from more scrapes. The Dooley Truck that took up most of the road made me slow down. The ambulance had to be stuck in traffic just a few cars back from where the collision occurred. I had to notice the girl on the Razor scooter whisking down the sidewalk as I passed her and that red car had to make that left hand turn as I was about to ride straight.

And if only one thing had happened differently: If that Dooley truck was in the other lane or that girl on the Razor left 2 minutes earlier, I could've been under the car, the little girl could've been hit by that car or the red car could've made a left turn without hitting anyone. "But life being what it is - a series of intersecting lives and incidents, out of anyone's control:" I was hit by that car and fell to the ground with the little girl on the Razor scooter coming to my side and asking if I was ok. The EMTs quickly tending to my scrapes and the that guy in the red car rolling down his window to ask if I was ok, only to drive away without an answer.

It's strange what you think of during an accident. The first thought that came to my mind when the EMTs asked to clean the wound was "I should have shaved my legs this morning." For some reason everything else was a blur, but that thought is vivid.

day 060: meltdown

Friday was meltdown day. I need to find a job.

Thank you to all of my supportive friends and family. I wouldn't be able to deal with this if it weren't for you.

day 056: cupcakes

I remembered that Bianca gave me two cupcakes yesterday, and they are beautiful, but don't show the creativity & concept of the whole collection. I can't believe I didn't take a picture. This afternoon I enjoyed one with a green tea Mochi.

I'm sure if you wanted, she would make cupcakes for your next party.

day 055: sunny days sweeping the clouds away

on my way to where the air is sweet...
Today was a beautiful day in Los Angeles. This morning, I had plans to join Sandy, Adrian, Valerie and Mallory at the Farmer's Market in Santa Monica/Venice. And I ended up going to the wrong Farmer's Market. hahaha... only me, I know. By the time I found the correct Farmer's Market, it was closing up, so I raced around for some fresh beets. mmmmm We walked Venice Boardwalk, and I was freaking hot because I layered up. It was a beautiful day to be at the beach.

Then I raced over to the La Brea Tar Pits to celebrate with Bianca and friends. I have so many Piscean friends, I love it. This park is perfect for a picnic and hanging out with friends. Lunch was a wonderful assortment of pasta, Roscoe's Chicken, spring rolls, pita/hummus, cuties, brownies, igloo shaped cupcakes and ice cold orangina. Kids provided entertainment, parties are always better with kids. :) Happy Birthday, Bianca.

day 041: griffith park

Today, I rode my bike to Griffith Park to meet Mark, Kristy, Steven, Joanna and Bianca. It was such a beautiful day in LA and jasmine is in full bloom so the streets are filled with it's sweet scent. I arrived super sweaty and super late: the stupid hills. wow! I thought it would be a fairly flat ride, but climbing up Western was a chore. Remember, I'm just getting back into cycling..post op.

We enjoyed watching the donkeys and took a train ride around the park, it was such a beautiful day. Kristy & Steven are the most well-mannered kids I've met. They are so sweet.

And Amy, I did manage to wear my riding clothes under my afternoon dress. That's a spin on the running clothes under the dress. :)

day 040: memories

I'm scared of what people are going to write. I could never run for public office and I know that. In fact some of the memories created recently are enough to ruin anyone's career. hahaha

Leave one memory that you and I share, the first thing that pops into your mind will do. It doesn't matter if you know me a little or a lot, anything you remember! Don't send an e-mail message, but leave a comment here. Next, re-post this in your notes and see who leaves a memory for you..